Day 883: Appreciation, The Good and Bad (Perspective)

Along with the good someone says about you, is it possible to appreciate the bad some talks about you, sought out of self-interest to make one look good, under reasons defined for their own self-recognition, which really shouldn’t have to be the case, because of being accepted by others just the way we are, that’s cool in a way how we normally are, without all the extra additive s*** we stuff in to a personality, that characters our individualism in division with others, who then may turn around and appreciate seeing you for who you are, where the “Fool me once” aspect may come into play – that’s Facing Our Own Ludicrousness before learning to change, like looking at one’s own starting point for going into things, and watching how vulnerable we are with those presenting themselves as trustworthy, and deserving of a friendship they’ve said to have fostered on their own, but one cannot spin this merry go round alone = if the appearance is appreciation but really apprehensive to the plight of another, it’s extensive the length we’ll go to to make ourselves look right, until ‘the cat is let out the bag’, could it be that things are in reverse, that doesn’t mean we should judge another for what we may have done first.

I mean it’s like a curse to suppress our own self-worth, in exchange for the insecurity that I’m not enough, which is made up in the mind right behind the words ‘shut up’, thinking what I have to say may fall on deaf ears, when all the while this is just related to fear and should appreciate what each situation is showing us, that may come in a way we least expected it, and from whom we’re gifted to have know thus far, it’s always an eye opener to see yourself in another, that un-blankets the smothering we’ve done to our expression, where you can’t blame someone for our own acceptances, we’ve allowed in our past that came around full circle, and think, is this deserving when I’m a changed person, or is this change just a dress rehearsal for what we haven’t corrected yet.

Before programming ourselves it’s rehearsed the mind states we go into, not considering the consequences we may cause upon ourselves, which is consciousness playing out the part of human nature aloud, as we proudly sit back thinking I’m quick to the punch, and rather enjoy how easy it is to beget spite with spite, thinking it’s alright because you did it to me first, as we sabotage the relationship by making things worse, and quick to walk away thinking I can’t stand this person, when it’s the personality we’re presented we can’t stand to correct, and because we can’t see it we take things personal, and purposefully hold the others feet to the fire, lying to ourselves “I don’t appreciate what you did”.

But because we’re not standing as the person in consideration, we’d rather debate in validation they don’t know what they’re talking about, instead of appreciating how we’re shown the flaws in expectations, we’d soon wait for the right time to put them in their place, and only later on realize we didn’t have to save face, about what it is we’ve chosen to miss take as a mistake, and even though it may have come be way of another, if I appreciate the uncovering of a deep seeded personality, within myself would be best for me to correct and move on, because as it was said you need all your relationships when moving forward in this process, instead of secluding myself and staying within the mess I know best.

What I realize is that it’s not really that hard to appreciate the bad of another, along with the good if my starting point brings it back to me, in the sense of investigating the things I see in another, that I too may have perpetuated to/towards others in my past, because when it all boils down to it, we bring things upon ourselves, but blame the other person for mirroring the hardness of human nature, I mean we all still exist as this hardness of human nature, that is possible to correct and become a living example, and what I mean by living example is to inaugurate a new start, of being aware of the things we come up with to say in the moment, and with how we choose to say it and to whom it may concern, should be considered the ripple effect it may cause in our ‘Worlds/War with Relationships’.

With this could it be I/we’ve been partial to appreciation, only appreciating the things that feeds our self-interested Ego, but when the Ego takes it revenge we start to feel low, instead of slowing ourselves down to see how we should appreciate both, the good and the bad shown as this would only make us stronger, where when corrected, together we stand stronger as all humanity alike, that starts with you and I putting aside the need to fight, that just so might be the light that’s talked about at the end of the tunnel, that was never reached for being so goddamn dishonest, I mean could it be that on the other side of right is common sense, but to get there we all have to stop chasing after broken promises. Therefore –

Appreciate this; I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have appreciated what I wanted to, as someone being there for me in my time of “need”, and all the good things I felt that complemented me, and the compliments from others made me feel at ease, without considering I should also have a look at the other side of the equation, where with the bad, I pushed aside to give way to the point of agitation, instead of appreciating being able to see in real time, points I may have existed as and not corrected, by way of another showing me my own human nature.

Where I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be partial with appreciation, only appreciating the good and disregarding the bad as something not worth my appreciation, but not to say you should just accept the bad being done unto you, as this would imply, me purposefully given into the plight of another, but to consider in appreciation what the situation is showing me, so the next time my starting point for going into things is corrected.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have been one to be quick to fall into the conflict of things, welcoming it in order to say I won on the other side, then only appreciating having the last word with more people on my side, that has sabotaged a few relationships in my life, but interesting how when this last situation that I just faced with someone came up, after the initial shock of it, instead of rushing into making a statement about my ‘rightness’, I chose to slow myself down and look at the situation from an objective point of view, along with sharing it with a few people in my world, that gave me the space needed to bring things back to self, that brought up this point of appreciation that I hadn’t looked at in this way.

So to me when appreciating what we see/face/shown and do, see being done and so express what we learned, no matter good or bad, helps in piecing myself back together into being the best version of me, and hacks many points of conflict, fear and insecurity, because I’ve taken the BLAME away from them to EMAIL BACK to Self, Self-Responsibility – That I now can use Appreciation in a constructive way for Myself, when it comes to the bad/negative problems and conflictual situation, that stops me from getting all roweled up about correctable occurrences in my life, to be able live Appreciation as my form of expression.

Thanks for reading.

About carltontedford

In Process.
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