Day 789: What’s a Point

Once a point in time was once a point in my mind and once a point in mind it’s hard for me to see straight, a magnificent design embedded throughout time, that’s a fine line between existing and living. The gift of giving is worth expressing and living, especially when the gift is directed toward self, and all that’s left is to see a point as a gift and gift yourself the self-help.

If it’s all about me let me tell it myself, I think we can pick and choose who we want to be vulnerable with, and if spite is at table it’s hard for me to sit, because I can fill it as a veil that covers up the real shit, so please don’t anoint me with your words of praise, because these same words of praise are the same words that fades, when secretly envying what you didn’t say first or face on face first bases that could be worse, in which case the light should be shined on the points you face, without using what I’ve done as an example for your own saving grace.

But what’s a point? Outside of pointing fingers the reaction to the finger being given to you, gestures that quester out the anger in us, and feel good about being the last one to speak, with all this energy accumulating to consequence, we rarely ever notice our fault in the matter, and after taking matters into our own hand, stand in the background with no responsibility taken, until we’re awaken with back pains and a stiff neck, then beg the doctor for a prescription of Percocet’s, or any other medication as a quick fix cure, that lures us in to suppressing the point, and at times this medication can be smoking a joint, I mean I know because I’ve been there plenty times before, but didn’t use it for what it was really created for, that is to see how I exist within my level of programming, then deconstruct the programming to rebuild a new me, and rebuild this new me into the best I can be, so that all may see that I can be trusted with life.

It may sound foreign but we do this every day, when waking up emotional to start our day, that in turn destroy our day from carrying this baggage around, that’s usually an idea of saying; “What Now” when getting out of bed and someone has pissed us off, and if you live by yourself, you done pissed yourself off, from thinking about all the stuff that has pissed you off, then become overwhelmed with being pissed off, and lord help those under you, if you’re in an authority position, and missing the point, that I make critical decision on other people lives that’s alive like you, that ends up making it bad for guys like me, but it’s guys like me who’ve let it happen to self, because of missing the point of standing up for self, while standing next to you as the self I am, that we will inevitably handle the point.

What’s the point when making it a point to argue with someone, that gets you nowhere, but drained by the point, and drained by the fact that we had nothing to say, but said something anyway that complicated things, that complicated the real point that we’re obviously missing, if an argument is imminent then it needs immediate attention, to stand up within without moving a muscle, and hustle towards correction that’s a blessing for the both, that I know the real point is obviously me, so here I do a correction on what I see.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to excuse the point of explaining myself, by explaining how deep I was still connected to the point, in so many words that took my breath away, and created thin air in the relationships I’ve had. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to afterwards feel sad for the exposure that posed a threat to me, because of wanting to express my own vulnerability with whom I pick and choose, as a chosen way to handle it all, then fall trying to handle it my own way. I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see the fallacy in the point of a fall, that is to relive the standing up from within it again, as many times as it takes for us to get it again, and get it to the point of seeing it coming and doing something about it the next time around, and ground ourselves within the point of correction, and that’s a point.

Thanks for reading.

About carltontedford

In Process.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s