Day 743: Being Present, an Unpopular Demand

When escapism is in full demand, as the art of getting away from Here without moving a muscle or lifting a finger to go anywhere, I can do it all upstairs in my mind, as the preoccupation of wasting time, that stops me from seeing with clarity a way out of what we get ourselves into, that demands our Presence in order to move through it and not around it, which is suppression, that only comes back around 10-fold the more we suppress it.

Is it really boring to be here with ourselves, to not have any thoughts about someone else festering around in our minds to be used as a point of blame, because it just feels easier that way, instead of being ashamed of the way we precariously place ourselves in such positions, that demands our presence to get ourselves out of.

What happens is during the search for answers to our questions, when seeing how we put ourselves in such a position, we tend to bring up all the wrongs we think others have done, in their lives (that doesn’t have anything to do with us) and compare ourselves to them, then wonder why nothing has happened to them, but us, then blame the Universe/God/The Elements/different Entities or Deities that this is unfair, I mean how can this be, I’m walking my process, and the hard pill to swallow is that we know why this is, and so become envious in a way towards those in other locations, who’s walking their own process in their own way.

And that for some is what takes us back, in wanting to mimic what they’re doing, with the belief that I can get away from and/or not have to experience the consequences to what we’re facing, which is a very slippery slope, if one chose to go down that path, that has probably crossed the minds of many of us at one time or another, which stems from not being Present when walking through some of the things we face.

What’s not realized, is that there’s a difference between thinking your way out of something and walking through and out of something, where the picture of thinking, lies to us as a good idea of something to do in the moment, as a band aide (that has minimal effect) to the gaping wound of a problem we’re dealing with, and so make a compromising decision to once again follow the pretty picture of resolve in our minds, and find ourselves more entrenched within the problem.

Where on the other hand, walking through and out of the problem, houses the specificity of not missing a thing, which at times may seem like a waiting game to reach your resolve, but during this wait is where it all goes down (per se), but up if we use this time wisely, to correct anything else that comes up within it.

Interesting point that I easily missed when thinking I was looking at different options I had, but not only that, these options of mine turned into distractions of the mind, that pushed aside the clarity needed for me to see where I’m stepping, when walking through what I’m facing, like a pair of foggy glasses, that’s fogged up with thoughts of others and what they’re going through, instead of what they’ve walked through that I can learn from that.

Point being, if I’m going to be in my mind it should be as my mind, to recollect and follow the steps of those who have gone before me, that have walked through points that I currently face, and in any moment of occurrence have a cool cross-referencing point to start from, in walking myself out of it.

And by seeing it this way, stops me from following the formulation of random thought about others when they come up, by simply asking myself, ‘what can I learn from this person/thought coming up right now, in adjacent with what I’m facing, and if nothing Forgive and delete., making being Present for me a Popular thing to do and place to be, Right Here, Right Now.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/perceive/believe that a resolve to any problem is to think my way out of it, that would show itself as a form of distraction, that I didn’t see would veil the point of clarity in seeing a clear path ahead on the road to correction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the prolonging of staying within a problem I was doing to myself, by being in my mind thinking about other and the wrongs I perceive them doing, then compare myself to them, in saying why isn’t nothing happening to them, to some unknown force or entity, as a complainer of things being unfair, which is only an excuse of validating the resistance I experience to facing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not be present and focus on a sustainable resolve to what I face but allowed my mind to go haywire with ideas of grandeur as quick ways to get myself out of things, that only placed me deeper into the problem.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that if I’m going to be in my mind it should be as my mind, to recollect and follow the footsteps of other who have gone before me, that has walked through points that I currently face, to in any moment of occurrence have a cool cross referencing point to start from, in walking myself out of it, and if there’s nothing I can learn from the person/thought that comes up, in adjacent to what I currently facing, then forgive and delete, so I can see with clarity the correction to the points I’m facing. Which in turn makes my being present a popular demand, in the state of me.

Thanks for reading.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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