Day 608: “H” as in “Help”

As one of the most Predominate words starting with the letter ”H”, that I’ve used, consisting of;

“Help”, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up, but not good enough, except when your fall is physical, other than that, it’s like begging for Hell-Please, that falls on deaf ears, although “Heard”, but no compassion for those who can’t “Help” themselves in the broad scheme of things, I mean if you’re literally deaf dumb and blind, all you got is your mind, which is one “Hell” of a way to live, and “Half”, (If not all the time) we act def, dumb and blind, when following the mind, so give me a “Hand” please, without clapping, because my one “Hand” is on figuring out my problems and the other is gesturing to get your perspective on what I have done thus far.

Is it really “Hospitable” to “Help someone after they’ve gone down the tubes when trying to figure things out for themselves, then “Hey” this person needs “Help”, but by that time, they “Have” one foot on a banana peel and the other “Halfway” off the cliff of insanity, because all their life the details on “How” to, was a bit blurry, and the explanation they received was standardized, which doesn’t work for every single person, I mean I should know because I’m one of them. Then you “Have” those who only step in after one person took the initiative to do and say something, as if to say; “Oh this person is cool now”, let me share my perspective, I mean 1 person can’t Help everyone in the world alone, and maybe not even 2, so “How” can I claim that I’m one and equal with everyone alike, when I don’t respond to and or give them the time of day/patience/courtesy and respect the same as I done those who I know? Really.

So you see the word “Help” “Has” been somewhat of a battle throughout my life, being that when I didn’t readily receive it, I would give up in a way, but if I really had to do it, I would do it my own way, and blame the fact that others didn’t want to “Help” me, on the way things turned out, but How about now, one would ask as a question raised under suspicion, defining the “Help” I should be giving myself, and giving myself; but to completely live the word “Help” as an Expression of me, a redefinition is in order, but first


I have used the word “Help” as a Positive connotation of the word, in a sense of needing a “Hand” for “Heavy” lifting and/or moving things around, as a question of uncertainty growing up of “How” to tie my shoe, and as a point of need when first starting out on a new phase of things.


I’ve also used the word “Help” in a Negative sense of the word, when laziness arises in the moment of resistance claiming; “Ah man I don’t feel like doing this, I need “Help”, as an abdication of my responsibility. And seen used unto me, as a cause for chastisement coming from a Parent or older Guardian for the moment stating, this will “Help” you to remember next time, which is a lie and really used for an Egotistical Power trip of releasing one’s anger and as a control measure.

Sounding of the Words


I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to Have Defined Help in the sense of resisting the chance to take self-responsibility for figuring things out, as a preliminary investigation to a point I’m walking in my life, where laziness sets in at the sight of seeing something that seems complicated then thinking I need Help, which in that case is more like a call to saying I want to remain in Hell-Please, instead of seeing/realizing Help to be that in which I ask for only after I’ve gotten to a point within my own self-investigation and need assistance to further my understanding on the current subject matter, therefore I Hereby Redefine Help to being that support received, when asked, after I have come to widths end or deadlock within a point of situation in my life.



I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to Have added my version to something I’ve Heard with the intent of making it more than it seem and/or making it sound good, as if I was the creator of it, Defining Heard as my perception of knowledge and information received, instead of listening intensely to what’s being said to not mistake or change any of it.


I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to Have believed Hell to be someplace out there one would go to, if they didn’t follow the design of a belief systems God, instead of realize, the induction of Hell I place onto myself on a Daily basis, by following my mind around, that I’ve given the Master Controls of my life to, to direct me. Therefore, I commit myself to Helping myself to regain Directive Principle of me, by stopping my participation in this Hellish way of thinking that I Have patronized myself to living/being/becoming, to becoming who I am as life, as all as one as equal, bringing forth Heaven on Earth for all to live in.


I forgive myself that I Haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize my hand as two points of assisting myself to create that which is best for all life, in all ways, but have created self-abominations that I would call, my work, because society Has deemed it to be cool, which left no room for me to lend a Creative Hand to those really in need, because I wasn’t in fact Handing myself the Help I needed to learn How to create and How I was created. I commit myself to Handing over to me that in which I’m missing as the point of Self-Creation.



I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to only perpetuate an act of Hospitality, whenever it suited my self-interest out of spite to some who didn’t agree with the way I would Help other and for what reason, in some cases, but in other , chase after the positive energy of doing so, which in fact is consequential to myself on both end, therefore, I commit myself to living the word Hospitable as a form of expression to myself first, before I try and project it onto others in a Positive or Negative way.

Hold-Spite-Able – meaning no spite involved


I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to Have not accepted the responsibility for the things I perpetuated onto towards others, as the HAVES when writing out my Self-Forgiveness statements, therefore I commit myself to continue taking responsibility for the HAVES I Have done unto others through the continuation of writing my Self-Forgiveness Statements.


I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to Have used the word How as a point of questioning a Self-Interest, not as a point of questioning myself through introspection, so I commit myself to gifting myself the word/question How, when coming to a point where introspection is needed.

Thanks for Reading.

About carltontedford

In Process.
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