Day 596: Withholding Reactions Pt. 2

I’m sure most of us have experienced in our past talking to someone and/or have gotten into some sort of confrontation with someone, through a phone conversation, or in person, where we’ve taken things a bit too personal, but withheld our reaction until later on, due to the lack of having the words to say in the moment, then 4 or 5 hour later that day or maybe even the next day or longer, send a text after response, reacting to something that took place too long ago, because we didn’t let it go, but let the reactions accumulate within and as us, to the point of coming back at the person with a bunch of weird shit, then felt vindicated as soon as we sent the text off, as if we’re good to go now and can go on with our day thinking that everything would be fine, since we got the last word, but when we get a WTF response back from the other person, we claim that they’re out of line for reacting to our text. Like What, who does that anymore?

Not to take anything away from anyone, but since I have perpetuated this behavior in my past, it shouldn’t be a thing to experience this being done unto me by someone in my world to present date. Thing is when the shoe is on the other foot, it becomes a different story, where the unexpected, becomes a bit mind blowing, because in this case, there wasn’t any conflict (per se) involved, but a basic Q&A session I had with a friend of mine a few times and everything else was in their mind, and being that you know exactly what they’re going through, you might find yourself starting to react to it, because this is not the first time you have explained this to this friend, so my point being, what should one do?

Now the first thing that readily comes to mind is to disassociate yourself from them, but then realize, that won’t work, because you still have to see this person from time to time, the next thing that comes to mind is to tell everyone around you about how this person is, but that won’t work because that’s straight up gossip, which achieve nothing, but a momentary energetic rush for one’s own self-interest, which houses double the consequences, being that you’ll pay for what you’ve said and for putting this person in a compromising position, where others would now look at this person differently, because of what you said, and that too is on you.

Then you have the least road travel, of accepting who this person is, placing yourself in their shoes and treating them as YOU would like to be treated, meaning, since you’ve been there, and have perpetuated this same behavior as them – to look within yourself to see how long it took you to move passed this same point, which should make it easier to be patient, to share more realization with this friend and stick to walking this point with them, for the simple fact that you have explained to them the basics of what they’re going through, which makes it your/my responsibility to follow through with what you have explained to this person, that someone else have done the same for us without question, is how I see that this point should be handle.

A self-reminder to breathe is very important and crucial in a case like this, because through text lol one can get you pretty riled up, where you’re like, I just explained this to you, then go to say something else, then realize I “Oh shit, I need to take it down a few notches, because I’m letting myself become hook line and sinker, in essence being pulled down into a conflictual situation/confrontation, when all they’re really screaming about (and every human for that matter) is, HELP ME TO SEE, but might have weird ways of saying it, I mean when you really look at it Humanity is screaming out for help.

So, what I responded with and told them, was to take a Breath and just say Stop, tell your mind to stop, this after being cursed out and hung up on. The next day came in with an apologetic text which I accepted and when I saw them later on that day, they thanked me for the text I sent them the day before.

Being that honesty is the best policy, I had to be honest with myself that I was still withholding reactions within me a bit until I saw this person the next day, which could have easily been washed away, once I saw them and they thanked me, but again I would have faced consequences for it, so I had to write this point out and did self-forgiveness for me, and that’s the other point I experienced with withholding reactions and that’s it.

Thanks for reading.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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