Day 498: Unformatted Writing

unformatted-writingMore like a rant and a rave on what comes up in your mind in the moment, during your everyday interaction with yourself, is what I use to create my unformatted writings, sometimes the structure is in the way one “wings” it, just right down the thoughts how they come out, as the topics to be used when writing yourself out.

So lately I’ve been Mapping myself out, but in the beginning faced a bit of resistance in how to structure it/format it and after going around in circle for a bit, I decided to write out the top 10 thoughts for starters as, why am I thinking this questions, which actually opened up a structure in itself, where instead of looking/searching for the memories, it is easier at times for me to start with the thought that would bring up a word (for example), the word blame, then go backwards from there, with who I was blaming in the thought that came up, then into every person I’ve blamed for something, where the memories of everyone who I blamed in my past, would come up more easier, then write my initial Self-Forgiveness on everyone who I’ve blamed, then go back into specific on the situation I’ve blame that individual person for and so on and so forth, which created some what of a format in itself, to my Unformatted Writing.

I’ve often felt lost and reluctant to doing things that didn’t have a format to them, I mean there’s always a way of doing things or might I say, many different ways of doing thing, but when you first start out doing something for the first time, it can become a bit overwhelming, which was one of my problems in grade school were if a person didn’t walk me through it step by step, I wouldn’t get it, but if it had a specific outlined format with examples to them, then I’d pick up on it, but what I didn’t realize however is how limiting this was, in a way where I would just give up and not do it, claiming that no one wants to help me out, but I didn’t help myself out and this is where figuring things out for yourself comes in.

I figured that there was a specific format in figuring thing out for myself, so when others would tell me to figure things out for yourself, lol, I would then think or say; “Well give me a format”, how do you do that, in expecting this grand layout in steps for me to take, that would get me on the right track of figuring things out for myself. Within that the point that I was missing was the myself/yourself part in it all, by myself, simply because I didn’t trust myself with what I would come up with, so the figuring didn’t happen (along with a little laziness) but sometime the only help you need is a word or a few words that would open up a mountain of things.

Just so happened in the private interview reading I got a while back, those words was to Map myself out, which was all I needed for me start after all in laying a foundation for me to work from, where the structure is in the unformatted way I’m going about writing me out, that works for me, so the other day I was talking to my buddy who asked me how was my list going as I begin to share the unformatted format of how I was writing myself out, and during the conversation, a lot more opened up, than I imagined would, where we discussed different ways that we both would try, which are simple way in looking at the Patterns/Habits and Behavior I have, which was cool, and motivating for me to continue, so now instead of me grunting and grimacing to the work I have to do on myself in writing me out, It’s now fun and enjoyable, being that the format I’ve laid out for myself is easier for me to see/look at and correct myself with.

So, for the simplicity of the Private Interview reading that I got, I am grateful, because it opened up a part of me that I hadn’t really accessed for myself, which in itself is one way of expanding/growing and developing myself even more into my utmost potential and thanks to my buddy for directing me to see and open up the format within my Unformatted Writing. So this Just a cool realization I had, as I continue being a work in progress.

Thanks for reading.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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