Day 458: Hope/Wishes/Dreams

hope-wishes-dreamsI Wish I had a million dollars, I’ll save the world, then get a million dollars and forget everything you just said, being that in most cases you won’t even help your own family members if they’re in need. I wish that I was magic and could disappear from this place, the abdication when responsibility is starring you in the face, wanting all our problems to go away. I wish that I could get back together with my Ex, so I’ll beg in love looking for another chance, but end up pushing them further away as only I can, not realizing that wishes are but ideas of hope, to clean up our life, where for some reason we think that if we think about something long enough it will happen, but it never does.

I Hope that when I die people will remember me, being that hope is a suicide note waiting to happen, in hope of, wishful thinking, just in case they might come through, but never do and fine ourselves experiencing one let down after the next, then end up saying I hope I can get my ass out of this mess, being stuck in an endless cycle of perpetual stress, going nowhere, but not Here, not realizing that HOPE is the key to limitation, because if you’re hoping, you’re not doing, like hoping to change, the same as hoping for change when you’re broke, it won’t come, so stop hoping and start hopping around, getting yourself moving, because change will only come when we walk our process.

Nothing is going to stop my Dreams from becoming real, all I got to do is work hard and I’ll make it, well, keep dreaming kid, being that it takes more than hard work to make any dream come true, as it all looks good running around in your mind, then reality sets in and you find yourself creating another dream. Follow your dreams son, said the parent to the child, I dreamed of be rich, but look at me now, just a stone’s throw away from barely making it, but at least I look the part, even if I’m faking it, we settle for less, then say that wasn’t my dream in the first place, then criticize those who came up faster than we did, was my thinking when I was a kid.

And as we grow up these things don’t really change, our hope, wishes and dreams absolutely remain the same, we could be in our forties, still inspiring to be a rap star, driving a nice car and maybe buy a Bar., but that’s still just wishful thinking, in hope that our dreams come true, when all the while nothing changes for you.

What I realized is there is nothing substantial in this world that warrant a hope, a wish or a dream, just that if we stop Hoping, Wishing and Dreaming = we’ll be moving forwards, taking responsibility for us, as us, for all, as us, but first we must, I must

Forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/perceive/believe that my hope, my wishes and my dreams is all I have to get me through this life, not realizing the limitation, that I am accepting and allowing myself to live as, whenever I say the words, I hope, I wish, and my dream is to be…

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hope for things I know won’t happen, unless I move myself in taking self-responsibility to making them happen. The world won’t change itself, unless I change me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Wish myself into a stupor, being that all my wishes were self-interest base – that all wishes are self-interest based in hope of/for things in my world to magically change and/or get better for me and only me, me, not once considering the we in it All, as All, as what is best for ALL life, which includes me, no wishing needed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a Dreamer, day dreams, night dreams, my dream is to be a…, thinking what I would conjure up in my mind using my imagination, I would be able to place myself in the same position I saw someone else in, on TV, in the media, down to the neighborhood baller, superstars, actors and musicians, irrational dreams, being that they wasn’t my own, not realizing that my dreams were but illusive visions that was unattainable, due to the environment I placed myself in and became the person I was. To this day memories of dream’s, I once had, still come up within and as me, so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed memories (to this day) of past dreams I had to still come up within and as me.

And so on and so forth until I no longer have the desire to Hope, the desire to Wish, nor the desire to Dream, but to be Here in the Present, to live Here in the Present, with Nowhere to go, to experience the veil lifted, to see all as me, which all starts with me stopping my Hope, Wishes and Dreams.


About carltontedford

In Process.
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