Day 452: Anticipation

anticipationWhen I was little and was told something, then left waiting, I would have this anxiety, nervousness and fear coming up within and as me, butterflies in my stomach and shaking profusely, this was of course in expectation of being/getting in trouble, where the time in between (to me) waiting for my punishment to happen, was worse off than the punishment itself, as hell and wouldn’t want anyone under any circumstances to experience this feeling, as a Negative connotation to the word. Anticipation.

In any competitive sport, martial arts for instance they teach you to anticipate your opponents moves, beating them to the punch (per se), placing yourself one step ahead of the competition, a precursor to an action, causing a change of action as a reaction to what just happened, for instance if someone makes you flinch/startles you (Boo) and you through your arms up in the air as a Defense Mechanism, just in case, which is also based in fear, as another Negative connotation to the word. Anticipation.

Anticipation, or being enthusiastic, is an emotion involving pleasure, excitement, and sometimes anxiety in considering some expected or longed-for good event. (Wikipedia)

Words Connected to Anticipation

. Prediction
. Expectation (epistemic)
. Hope
. Optimism
. Faith
. Confidence
. Delayed gratification

Sounding of The Word

. Anti – Patient

. Ain’t Seeing No Patience

. Can’t See Patience/Can’t Be Patient

. Antsy Pants

Creative Writing:

Anticipation is an essential feature of human action. “In every action we know the goal in advance in the form of an anticipation that is empty’, in the sense of vague. When anticipating something we lose our sense of stability, becoming an “Antsy Pants”, Fidgety, Can’t wait to do something, go somewhere, get there, be there, we anticipate it every step of the way, meaning we are “Anti Patient”, we have no patience and hate waiting, so we rush into a predicted outcome, putting ourselves in a predicament, but calling it Anticipating what will happen, when we’re creating it all in our minds alone. The games we play with ourselves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to anticipate what will happen tomorrow and the next day and the next.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have defined anticipation in a negative connotation of the word as the going through hell, the in between time leading up to the punishment phase of being/getting in trouble.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have defined anticipation in a negative connotation of that word as in beating another to the punch (per se) in relations to a competitive sport i.e. Martial Arts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have defined anticipation as the excitement leading up to a longed-for event, within this excitement I become antsy pants, losing my sense of stability, which causes pain in my lower back and because I’m not stable and wanting things to hurry up and just happen already, I miss out on what’s here in front of me, lose focus on what I should be doing in time, instead of passing time away. Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to just pass time away, creating wasted time that can’t be returned, as every moment is valuable and vital to my process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in a way be anti-patient, because of not being able to wait for things to happen, in relations to the change in me, my understandings and realization to come forth, where I compare myself to others and how things seem to happen for them, to them, as I then anticipate them happening to me.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that Anticipation as we have defined it is but an emotion with generates energy for the mind consciousness system I have within me, causing me to be susceptible to body damage, brain damage, instability, confusion and furthermore the continued enslavement of myself to my mind.

So to stop this I am redefine the word Anticipation to that of; seeing that patience is needed when excitement and/or anxiety rises within me, having the clarity and stability to stay in the moment while looking ahead = And this is Paying Attention to my Self – Self-Trust

Words to Be Lives = Patient, In the Moment, Stability, Grounded, Breathe.
Anticipation

Thanks for reading.

Desteni.org

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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