Day 442: Compliments (continued)

Compliments-continuedPreviously on Compliments:

in looking back at it, it all stemmed from the repeated Compliments I heavily received from this guy in the beginning, which opened my eyes to the true nature of what we have accepted and allowed Compliments to be/become, almost like telling someone “I love you”, with a hidden self-interested meaning behind it, where in the end, you realize it was all a ploy/plot for something else, to get, to have, to obtain for self-interested reasons.

A polite expression of praise and admiration, is what’s tended or meant behind a Compliment, thing is one then becomes cocky/get the big head and/or think they’ve reached a level of dominance in a way, then become used to receiving these Compliments and limit oneself to the praise we receive from others, becoming self-righteous towards others, building oneself up to be let down in a major way, I mean, I fell for it hook line and sinker, then sunk into a depth of self-pity and disempowerment, once I stopped receiving these Compliment and was woken to the true nature of a Human being, this Human being and as things unfolded I saw the intention, how and why, things was being directed towards me and in such a way.

After I was then aware of what was going on, I saw this person do it to different people, one after another then another, where I had to look within myself to see where in my world have I existed the same way, where I would verbally praise someone the turn around and cut them down immensely in the next moment and although I didn’t find that I had done this towards other to such an extreme externally, I have Complimented someone and have had excessive thought about them internally afterwards, which is basically the same thing when you look at it, opening the door for it being done unto me, but worse.

From then on I’ve made it a point to watch closely when others would give me Compliment, if it wasn’t in relations to self-change or handling any situation effectively, but any other Compliments I am weary of and in some cases ask for an explanation as to why you’re complimenting me, and on the other hand, I’ve come to watch how/when and what I Compliment others on/about, as on both ends at times it may or may not be the best thing to do, in the moment.

So what I realized is there is fine line between giving and receiving a genuine Compliment to or from someone or it being that of self-interest, which has consequences, so for this;

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give and receive compliments as if they were going out of style, where I would give a compliment only if it suited my self-interest, in example telling someone in passing, or even going out of my way to tell someone they look good and would accept all compliments no matter the reason behind them and would derive energy from receiving them, thinking “Yeah I’m better than others”, look better than other, which I now realize, I let my ego step in, becoming cocky and stuck up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to derive energy from receiving compliments from other, as this was my way of judging myself as acceptable or not in conforming to what society deems as good/bad, cool or no cool in social standing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I’m better than other, look better than other, as I let my ego set in, becoming cocky and stuck up, because of the compliments I was receiving.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for judge myself as acceptable or not in conforming to what society deemed as good/bad, cool or not cool, which shows that I was living for what people would think about me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live for what people would think about me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, in being gullible fall for the compliments I was receiving, from an individual I was working with, to the point of becoming comfortable and expected them to keep coming, as I really thought this person was a cool friend for all the compliment they were giving me, not realizing that I was being set up for the fall and fell right into the ploy/plot that was being perpetuated towards me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have expectations in thinking that someone is on the up and up, when they are giving me compliment and look forward to receiving them all the time, that is until I had a wakeup call and realized how I was accepting and allowing myself to be deceived. Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be deceived by the compliments I was receiving.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have given someone a compliment verbally, then later on internally had these excessive thoughts about them, which shows that I was accepting and allowing the same to be done unto me, but worse.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that compliments are to be given unconditionally, with no expectations or hidden reason behind them, as this would imply that I am still wanting for something, looking for something that I haven’t given myself, and thus will accept the complaints of others and it’s now plain to see the amount of self-interest involved in giving and receiving compliments, so;

When and as I see myself giving and receive compliments as if they were going out of style, where in giving, I would expect to receive something in return, out of self-interest, and in receiving compliments I would derive energy from them and start thinking that I’m better than others, look better than others, separating myself form the compliment itself and becoming self-righteous as if I was dominant in the areas I received compliments on, I stop and breathe. I see/realize/understand that compliments are to be given and received unconditionally, without any expectations or hidden agenda, and as an expression of acknowledgement with what someone has done, that was an effective way of doing something and as a genuine acceptance and praise of a person’s personal self-growth/expansion/development.

I commit myself to redefining the word compliment to that of an expression of acknowledgement with what someone has done, that was an effective way of doing something and as a genuine acceptance and praise of a person’s personal growth/expansion/development, to be given and received as such.

I commit myself to no longer placing myself in the position of being and accepting random compliments from others for self-interested reasons, as I see/realize/understand, this is only a fall waiting to happen, where I then tumble down the rabbit hole of emotional turmoil, with is not cool, so;

I commit myself to being aware of when receiving compliments from others, accepting them if in the context of being genuine and to question what I may see as a less than genuine compliment.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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