Ok, so in my previous post I wrote about stability and afterward as I was still looking at the point, what came up is the word Urgency, a Sense of Urgency and/or the lack there of, so I will be investigating my relationship with this word/statement and why at times throughout my life I have experienced the lack there of, Urgency.
First and foremost a sense of urgency is the importance requiring a swift action, where when faced with a situation of importance that you must act upon, but have a bit of time/leeway, it is very important to let’s say “Dwell on enacting a solution” so to speak, as the time/leeway will slowly but surely dwindle down to just a few days, to the deadline being tomorrow and within that, anxiety, stress, frustration and anger ensues, this is due to using too much the beginning time that’s allotted, thinking about why this has happened and/or how one has placed oneself into said situation and/or who’s to blame for you being in the situation that one is now faced with, which then leads to a creation using our imagination in our minds, as to what has taken place, as we stay there for quite some time, before moving our lazy asses.
This is not conducive to moving forward to a solution and into resolve, but a stagnation and placation within the situation, just to in the end be disgraced by one’s own inaction. I’m sure this has happened to a lot of us, where we would initially rather analyze the situation in all its facet as a point of dwelling on the conflict aspect of it, with an eye on a resolve of getting even, which blinds up from seeing/realizing that this is our own creation and instead of debating with ourselves, take the time to recreate ourselves, so that we don’t make the same mistake again, that put ourselves in this position in the first place.
Where is the Urgency in the matter? I mean we most often urgently jump to conclusion of grandeur, to veil/hide/not see/not have to momentarily face the fact that we are the point of mishap, in fact we knew the outcome of such things happening, that is if we didn’t walk a fine line of implementing our actions. This in itself goes to show that we were well aware of all potential outcome, before making a decision to participate in what we did, so once again where is the urgency in getting ourselves out of the situation we’ve put ourselves in?
It is now easy to see how and why; throughout my life I wasn’t able to be totally stable throughout a situation into a resolve, because the lack there of a sense of urgency would set in, as I would spend too much time waiting for something/someone to come and save me out of the situation (because of being stuck in my mind), instead of making a valiant effort to exhaust all my option, by physically doing the leg work in looking for means to resolve the situation, I have inherently accumulated a laziness in the matter, therefore never experiencing a sense of urgency until it was way late in the game, with little to no time left to figure out a solution and ended up rushing every time, with extra consequences as a bonus for me to walk through.
I mean this is not cool, because in actuality I hate putting myself in this position of nervousness, as I watch the hand of time whine down to the last moments before I lift a muscle to do anything, once again, where is the sense of urgency. In this it seems as if I have defined a sense of urgency as; waiting until the last moment to do things, where I then experience a sense of rush, which comes along with stress and anxiety to follow into frustration and anger and leads to instability.
The solution is to, when faced with a pending situation as such, why’ll knowing it may have an adverse outcome, to first off be prepared, and instead of dwelling on the adverse outcome, have a sense of urgency to resolve the situation, then correct your stance with implementing what you did in the first place; Also and most importantly, I am redefining a Sense of Urgency, from that of waiting until the last moment to do things, where I then experience a sense of rush, to that of; being earnest and persistent in implementing a solution at the onset of being faced with a problem that one has created for oneself. So for this;
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to at times lack the sense of urgency in matters that requires my immediate attention, where I would wait until the last moment to do things in getting to the resolve of the matter and then experience a sense of rush.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have waited until the last moment to act upon a matter of urgent importance and try rushing my way into a resolve.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to then stress out about the matter at hand, because I would be thinking too much about why I am in the situation in the first place, how did I get/put myself into this situation and/or who is to blame for me being in this situation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look for blame immediately after being first faced with a situation, instead of having a sense of urgency, where I then veil/hide the fact of me being the point of blame, through trying to analyze the situation in all its facets, looking to shame others, instead of realizing the shame being on me. Shame on me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be stable throughout the situation into resolve, because I lacked the sense of urgency, due to the definition of sense of urgency that I had being; to wait until the last moment to do things, where I then experience a sense of rush and with rushing comes anxiety, stress and reacting with frustration and anger, leading to instability.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become stressed out and experience anxiety for me waiting until the last moment to do something about any pending situation I faced, where I then would react in frustration about the situation and into anger.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize until late the placement of myself as being the cause of any pending situation I’m faced with, which then, since I wasted time in the beginning, created more consequence for me to have to face and walk through.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have dwelled on the adverse outcomes of any pending situation, instead of dwelling on the solution, and so;
When and as I see myself being Faced with any pending situation, where I have an allotted amount of time to get myself out of it, where instead of having a sense of urgency, I wait until the last moment to do things and end up rushing and stressing out because of the rush, due to thinking too much about the situation and trying to analyze, why this happened to me and/or how did I get/put myself into this situation, then looking to projecting blame onto toward someone outside of myself without taking any responsibility for being the cause, I stop and breathe.
I see/realize/understand that in essence the fault is all mine, no matter who participate in it, which lead to my placement in the current situation, so be that as it may, I am now faced with a time frame to figure the situation out into resolve, which requires a sense of urgency and leaves no time to wonderment or speculation, as to what happen and who’s to blame, so instead of waiting until the last moment, to get my ass in gear in implementing a solution into resolve first and for most, then to correct my stance for placing myself in this situation in the first place, so that I don’t repeat the same mistake again., when implementing anything else.
I commit myself to redefining a Sense of Urgency from that of, waiting until the last moment to do things, when faced with a situation, where I then experience a sense of rush: To that of; being earnest and persistent when implementing a solution at the onset of being faced with a problem that one has created for oneself.
I commit myself to having a sense of urgency when faced with urgent matters, and no longer accept and allow myself to wait until the last moments to do anything about it.
I commit myself to taking responsibility for any pending situations I am faced with, with the immediacy as to what I see in the moment, without looking elsewhere for someone/something to blame, as this is a waste of time that has consequences attached to them, that I do not want to create for myself, so I’m off to find a solution.
Thanks for reading.