Day 401: Forgetfulness Pt. 2 (The Little Things)

Forgetfulness-The-little-thingsHow many things have you forgotten in the last hour, just a few minutes ago, a day or so ago that you said you would remember, to do, or say, and all that remain is the next thing you had your mind set on, you see because when your mind is set on something, it’s most likely based in self-interest, therefore you won’t forget that point, but again, if it has anything to do with self-awareness and self-expansion, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not remember to do/say this, that or the other, is what we end up saying, when our frail memory fails us, because it’s the smallest things we over look, that goes un-noticed, then turn into monsters of a headache, with Advil as the consequence in trying to quick fix the problem, by just laughing it off and saying oops I forgot, I mean how many times do we have to forget, before we get the fullness, the magnitude, the full understanding of what we are creating for ourselves as problems, when we don’t remember to do/say the little things, we’ve committed ourselves to do/say?

Forgetfulness is a big word with a small action behind it, being that it only takes you a spit second to forget something, but a lifetime to remember and rediscover who you really are, as we now have anthropologist and archeologist, rediscovering themselves, ourselves as if this is the first time we’ve ever looked in the mirror at ourselves, as what we really consist of and exist as, so to speak, well it’s not, but since the mind is there blocking the true vision and understanding of ourselves, we just “forget about it” and continue enjoying the sideshow, because for most of us, it’s easier to exist with a level of ignorance, to not know anything and remain in search of something, then it is to know the truth and batter yourself up over not having done a damn thing about it for so long, therefore we perpetuate forgetfulness and make movies about taking some pill to remember everything, in hope of limiting ourselves less than we already are.

Realizations are the first to be lost in the shadows of the mind, due to the fact we might see things with our Real Eyes for the first time in a long time, but have disguised the Real things between the fine line with Real Lies to cover them up, why’ll claiming I had a realization, which was a real life situation of chasing after energy, asking one another are you in to me and saying I like you, but I can’t remember your name.

Then is Forgetfulness but a game of hide and seek? Seeking after the true of yourself that’s been hidden in plain sight and veiled by the mind, our mind the part of us that thinks until we forget, I mean how do you know that you forgot, if you forgot what you knew? No don’t tell me that, I don’t want to see it and keep it to yourself, because if I see it, then remember it and create the picture in my head, I can’t help but feel bad about what others are going through from what you tell me, so I cover my ears to anything that has to do with doing what’s best for all, because if all have what I have, then what I have won’t be worth shit and I can’t have that, so I perpetuate a plausible forgetfulness to keep what I have; a numb dumbness.

I mean there are so many reason we give ourselves as to why we are forgetful and none of them are valid, then of course you have the anomaly, Memory Lost, Dementia and into Alzheimer’s, where all this time you remembered, then all of a sudden you forgot, because you’ve been stuck in your mind reminiscing about the past and trying to bring it back to relive it once again = you lose all touch with reality and become lost in a time loop of a past thought, in which case no drug can bring you back.

That’s why it is important to investigate your mind to understand why we daydream in moments and not remember what it was about, then come back to earth and can’t stomach what we see, then want to leave again, so we go back into our mind (through our cell phone) for most, using it as a time machine to escape from having any profound moments of realizations, any Ah Ha moments, that would change your life forever. So for this;

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself exist at a level of forgetfulness, where it’s the little things that I forget to do and/or say that I have committed myself to do/say.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think if I forget, it will be gone forever, not realizing that it’s still there, stored deeper in the confines of my mind, buried underneath what I have set in my mind to do and/or say.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to set in my mind and remember only the things based on my own self-interest, which makes it hard for me to remember the realizations I’ve had, let alone having more realizations in general.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize to stop my mind and see with my Real Eyes, but instead see Real Lies and think it’s the truth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have tried to excuse my forgetfulness by laughing and just saying oops I forgot, where before I remembered then thought about it until I forgot it, which shows that I didn’t become it and live what I was to remember, but stored it in my mind as another piece of knowledge and information.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to at times not live my realization through to actualizations, but have become happy with energy for seeing something new and then “forget about it”.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget about the things that really matter to me becoming more self-aware, growing/developing and expanding myself to my utmost potential.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have followed my mind design and layout, but not remind myself that I should be directing me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have given/used every excuse that I have to not remember things at time throughout my life, where I would fake as if I didn’t remember to do, say or be at a certain place at a certain time, invoking a level of ignorance onto myself to not have to face the consequences for my forgetfulness, but saying; “I’m sorry, I really forgot yo”.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that it’s the little things that I have committed myself to that I should remember, as these are the things that if continuously forgotten and go un-noticed turns into a monster of a headache, a problem and for this my applying self-forgiveness is useless, because there’s no follow through into living my correction, and so I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to live my corrections at times in relations to committing myself to remember to do and/or say the little things throughout my day, that I need to change my Human Nature.

When and as I see myself existing as a level of forgetfulness, where it’s the little thing that I forget to say and/or do that I have committed myself to do/say, then end up losing track of what it was that I had a realization about, to thinking that it’s gone/lost forever and eventually “forget about it” and go throughout my day doing/saying only the things I have set in my mind to do/say, which are for most part all self-interest based, I stop and breathe and tell myself whoa, it’s still there and all I have to do is to back track myself to the thought that interrupted my realization and forgive myself for it, then I will once again see the realization that I forgot.

I also see/realize/understand that it’s the little things that I have committed myself to that I should remember, as these are the things that if continuously forgotten and go un-noticed turns into problems, where my self-forgiveness becomes useless, because I am not following through into living my corrections and thus I’m not allowing myself to remember to do and/or say the little things throughout my day, that I need to change my Human Nature and so;

I commit myself to living my realizations as I see them with my real eyes and not the lies of self-interest I use to disguise/veil myself from remembering what I keep forgetting, as my keys to self-realization, self-correction then self-change.

I commit myself to no longer accept and allow myself to try using excuses to cover up my forgetfulness, but instead to stop my mind in the moments I need to do and/or say that which I’ve committed myself to do and/or say, so that I will remember it.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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