Day 355: Waiting for Others to do, What I should for Myself

Man-upThe easiest thing in the world to do is to become comfortable with accepting others willingly taking care of you and to have everything that you want need and desire at your fingertips, I mean who wouldn’t want this for themselves, when offered? Throughout my life I have become accustom to having everything I wanted in a way, where starting with my parent and me being the baby boy of 8, I really didn’t want for anything and have engrained this pattern of acceptance and waiting for others to do, what I should do for myself within and as me, where anytime someone would offer, let’s say in a relationship to take care of me, I have accepted it, which in turn made it hard for me to really get out there and do for myself, it’s like knowing what has to be done, because I’ve seen it plenty of times before and just getting out there and doing it.

So in essence, I now have to take care of my responsibilities in taking care of myself and handling what I would want for other to do, what I should do for myself, I mean I don’t see this as a problem, but just a pattern I have become accustom to, so for this;

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to throughout my life always have waited for others to do what I should for myself, where I have become comfortable with accepting others willingly taking care of me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have always accepted other people willingly taking care of me.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to take care of myself instead of accepting offers to be taken care of.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take it upon myself to do for myself throughout my life and thus have placed myself into a position of being used to others doing for me and thus have limited myself in knowing how to and doing for myself.

Although I have now been doing for myself for quite some time now there are still times where I find myself bringing up memories of my past, that I haven’t applied Self-Forgiveness for.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to bring up all these old memories of my past when I was being taking care of by others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not let go of these past memories unconditionally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have become lazy in a way where I had gotten used to being taken care of and too comfortable to take care of myself. Although I could have taken care of myself at any time, I didn’t

This pattern stems from laziness where I never got over being taken care of by my parents and had become too lazy to do for myself and it took up until walking my process to see the nature of my ways and change.

I now see/realize/understand that in accepting others to do for me, what I should do for myself, I have limited myself to the point of making it hard for myself when the time came for me to talk care of myself. If it wasn’t for my process, I would have still been following this same pattern and not direct myself.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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