Day 322: What We Condone as Men

What-We-Condone-as-menIt’s funny how we as men, boys, guys have this unspoken language of sorts, when it comes to looking at women, where if a lady, girl walks by and two guys are in the vicinity, who don’t even know each other, after she passes by, they’ll look at each other, smile and shake their head as if, they’re on the same page and thinking the same thing, which in most cases they are/we are, being that of; “Man what I would do with that”. A common saying within the circles of some men, when looking as a woman is; “That’s wifey material”, meaning that we would wife her for her looks and that’s all that matters to us, no matter how you put it, in saying “Oh no, I like her because she’s smart” or “She looks like a nice person”, that’s all bullshit, because if, IF you just met her, it’s as if you just got a brand new book and only read the introduction and not the book yet.

I mean, I’ve been down that road before and I tell you, it’s not what it’s cracked up to be, it’s just cracked up, from the perspective of, you’ll never know what you’re getting yourself into, if you don’t learn the person that you chose to spend the rest of your life with first, because they’ll be here today and gone tomorrow, so to speak, I mean I been through this a couple of time and each time I didn’t see my fault in the matter, until after the relationships was over and still didn’t see it, until I started walking my process From Consciousness to Awareness and only then did I learn how to investigate my role in every relationship I’ve ever been in, where I then saw my fault in the matter; But anyway, back to the point.

What we condone as men in making it a cool thing to call women out of their name as a degrading factor or in a slang terminology, is also not acceptable, because of the excuse we give as “She made me mad” or any other excusable reason for that matter and I’m not bringing this up to get some cool bullshit point with the ladies or shit like that, but as one who would be the first one to participate in these types of actions against women and now choosing to stand up and take responsibility for myself as to what I have accepted and allowed myself to be/become, perpetuate in my world and reality, Not Your, Mine, so I can finally release myself from this monster I have become, in separation from myself.

What we condone as men in thinking that a woman should stay at home, is what I grew up seeing, so when I got old enough and out on my own, I thought the same way and would leave my X behind when I would go out and do things. This also in hindsight and now (for me) was and is unacceptable, because it leaves a massive room for speculation, thought and the third degree, each time you come back home, which then caused division within my relationship, by following along with what I saw and thought growing up, that women should stay home, boy was I wrong.

What we condone as men in thinking that just because a girl looked at us and smiled or said hi, doesn’t mean that she wants to take us to bed with her, so I had to stop getting my hopes up for nothing, then the frustration ensues because you’re always wrong, we’re always wrong and the funny thing is, we’ll try and ignore it and wait for another signal that never comes. It took me a why’ll to get the point, She’s only saying hi. Lol.

What we condone as men and get mad at, is when we say hi to a woman and they don’t say it back. Would you think, that they would know what your starting point is for saying hi in the first place? Hmmm. Or maybe they probably didn’t hear you. Either way that nothing to get mad at, so check yourself, I had to.

So the other day I was at a store or somewhere outside, where there was another guy standing across from me and a lady happened to walk passed us, at which time the guy looked at her as she passed and then turned and look as me and started smiling and shaking his head, as if I was would be in agreeance with him, at which time I shook my head back at him, signaling the No gesture in disguise at what I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in, as this unspoken language of sort for so long, that we men at times participate in. I mean if it was before I started walking my process, then I would have agreed with him, as the lady was naturally nice looking, but since I’ve been walking my process, things have changed a bit, because I now see and know what I’m doing, so for me now, this behavior is unacceptable and looking back on my past, it’s crazy to see that I have been this way for so long.

I see/realize understand that I still have a long way to go within my process as far as what I have condoned as a man in my life, so I commit myself to continue to investigate the things I have condoned throughout my life and condemn, that which is/was not best for all life equally, man, women, child, nature and the animal kingdom, so that I may release myself from what I have become as a De-man and experience Who I really am as life. So man up.

About carltontedford

In Process.
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