Although it’s true that your body needs rest from time to time, throughout my life, I’ve over did it, from the perspective of getting, thinking/perceiving/believe that I need a lot of sleep, getting too much sleep. Meaning I never used to like getting up in the mornings, it was always a drag to start my day, especially when I was a kid. I guess my father knew this fact, because every morning as far back as I can remember, he would get us up early and have us in the hallway, upstairs in our home doing calisthenics (morning exercise), I mean it never failed, 6:00 am sharp up and at em’. Then afterwards, we would get dressed, have breakfast and go about our day. This was interesting because only when I joined the military, did I appreciate having to get up early as a child, as this is the military’s forte, it was like I was being trained for the job so to speak, but didn’t know at the time (as none would actually).
When I got out the military, it was back to sleeping longer hours, plus I added in staying up/out late, as if there was no tomorrow, I mean back then, I had no concept of the saying, “Early bird gets the worm”, to me that was just a saying to get me to wake up early and out of bed, which I didn’t like doing, no way no how. I mean having to wake up early, let alone being forced to wake up at sleep:30 am in the morning, was not my idea of a good time, I wanted to sleep as long as I wanted to and then get up when I wanted to, but surviving in this world really doesn’t allow for that, so I guess you can say that I was being groomed for the process that I am currently walking, but before then, in hindsight looking back on my sleep habits/patterns, it’s fascinating how, whenever I would get woken up, I would become angry at whomever it was, (and get this) unless it (Honestly) had to do with money or some girl calling my phone, I mean anything else wasn’t worth me losing sleep over (so I thought) and what’s really interesting, that I realized was, the longer I slept during the night, the more tired I would be throughout my day, but that didn’t matter, because I thought it to be a normal occurrence for mine and everyone else’s body to be naturally tired in the morning (I’m sure for each person, it’s probably different) but for me being a sleepaholic, I still thought that my tiredness was because I wasn’t getting enough sleep, so image me always falling asleep throughout my day, because I was getting too much sleep, I just didn’t see it, get it. Funny, people used to tell me, it was like I had a sleep button on my ass, so every time I sat down, I would click the button and fall asleep. Lol
But seriously though, after a while, after the extra additives (drugs and such), I started to realize the times I was getting up, which would be around 11am, noonish and became mad at myself, when looking at all the time I’ve wasted and the things I missed out on in the early mornings, being up before first light and getting the “Worm” (per se).
This “Worm” of course was money and still is money in a sense of having to work to survive, so that’s how we have made it a given, Ok, cool, understood; But on the other hand, since I’ve started walking my process, I’ve realized the ultimate “Worm” of sorts, which is Myself, yes getting to know Myself, is what I have defined, when I get up early in the mornings as the “Early bird gets the worm”. An opportunity each day to get to know me (Who I am, really), focus on what makes me tick, what made me into, who I have made myself out to be, and correct it. Challenge myself to do things I’ve never done purposefully before in my life (for me), like getting up early in the mornings, I mean, I realized that if I can do this, with a little shove/push from myself and a little Honesty, in seeing/realizing and pointing out my faults to me, and Self-Honesty in correcting what I see as per the faults I’ve pointed out to myself, my reward would be giving myself the gift of learning me and in return the experience of Self-Change, for the first time in my life. So in essence Merry Christmas to Myself, because I decided to WAKE UP and realize that I’m the “Worm” and also realize that I have a lot of work to do.