“And I thought they would never go away”. Throughout my process I’ve tried to make it a point to notice and forgive every single thought that comes up in my mind, whether it’s just passing through and/or there to make me react with an emotion or feeling. What I’ve noticed was that most of these thoughts that keeps repeating themselves are remedial and irrelevant, but yet and still, I continue paying attention to them and go to apply self-forgiveness for the thought and five minutes later the thought would come right back around and up in my mind again. Another interesting thing, before I go any further that I’ve noticed about my thoughts is, (how do I put it) they are “place/area specific”, meaning let’s say for example I’m in the bathroom and I experience a few random thoughts; now whenever I go back in the bathroom those same thoughts I experienced from before comes back up and it’s the same when I’m in different areas around my place and like I said the majority of them are not relevant to what I’m doing in the moment, let alone anything.
The topic that I’m writing about came to me when I was listened to the EQAFE interview 412-reptilians-if-i-could-do-it-so-can-you-part-10, where it was being discussed how within the conscious mind within thoughts was created movement of preoccupation in keeping one preoccupied in constant/continual irrelevant thoughts, and as I am walking my process I only want to identify and work with and walk through my personalities, backchat chat and physical reactions and that my conscious mind is nothing compared to my subconscious and unconscious mind, and so if I am in anyway preoccupying myself with conscious mind thoughts, I am limiting and diminishing myself to the utmost potential in this physical world and this reality. Wow, I was blown away to not realize that I was paying attention to these randomize patterns coming from my subconscious and unconscious that was inserted in constant cycles of movement in my conscious mind to keep me busy and preoccupied and not return or stand or even realize or consider that there is something such as silence and stability that exist within me, “And I thought they would never go away”.
This is why I keep experiencing these random thoughts coming up within and as me, that have no relevance to whatever I’m doing in the moment, because by me paying attention to them, I am perpetuating, (sort of like egging them on) the thoughts to keep on coming up, time and time again and then I would get frustrated and wonder why and what am I doing “wrong” because I’m catching the thoughts; not realizing the difference between my conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind thoughts and how they work. I mean I also would at times experience what I believed to be stagnation within my process and all the why’ll to learn that my conscious mind thoughts are irrelevant and not worth paying attention to unless I want to stay in this same position of stagnation in my process for an extended period of time, well I don’t.
This interview gave me clarity with more perspective on how the mind works and where thoughts come from and so I will assist and support myself with the information in this interview in moving myself forward within my process of getting to know myself. I recommend having a listen to this interview to anyone who hasn’t; it has been greatly assistive to me for my self-movement.