Day 191: Resisting the Truth with Proof.

Resisting-the-truthWhen you have been assisted with the Truth of something, why is it that we don’t totally accept it as the truth, even when we know it is, and have experienced it as such? It’s like we turn around and create our own truth of things by adding our 2 cents of carnal knowledge and information to it as our based preprogrammed way of dealing with things, meaning this is how we choose to process the Truth, as in a way, resisting the truth although we know that it works. This is done unconsciously, like and over kill of some sort, meaning that after I realized it and tried it out, I let my mind get the best of me/direct me into disavowing the truth in which I was assisted with. The after realization of what I’ve done is worse off, because now I walk around feeling down on myself and ashamed of myself for not sticking with and to the truth as I originally saw it. Please don’t get me wrong because I am extremely grateful in every sense of the word gratefulness for the well needed assistance. I have to stop this pattern of adding my 2 cents of carnal knowledge and information into things, making it seem as if, I didn’t get the message or understood what I was shown, when in fact I did and saw it with clarity.

My participation in the mind is uncanny, where I mix the familiar (my preprogramming) and unfamiliar (the truth of things) in thinking/perceiving/believing this mixture of the truth and carnal justification to be how things work, not realizing that carnal justification which is in fact preprogramming can’t/don’t/will not, mix with the truth in anyway what so ever and makes no sense, so how is it then that I believed that the truth can be compromised? Through extensive brainwashing, meaning I’ve never known the real truth, (not to be used as an excuse) so when seen, laid out in common sense, it at times is still hard to believe (but understood) and I accept and allow my mind to interject based on my preprogramming and try overshadowing what the truth is, which in turn I create more consequences for myself to have to live with and walk through as if I haven’t experienced enough already.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist the truth with proof, meaning when I was assisted with the truth of something, I didn’t totally accept it as the truth, even when I knew it was and experienced it as such.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when shown the truth, turn around and create my own truth of things by adding my 2 cents of carnal knowledge and information to it, as my based preprogramming way of dealing with things, meaning this is how I chose to process the Truth, as in a way resisting the truth although I know that it works.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to unconsciously do this, like and over kill of some sort, meaning that after I realize it and tried it out, I let my mind get the best of me/direct me into disavowing the truth in which I was assisted with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to after trying out the truth of what I was assisted with, disavowed it, not realizing the after realization of what I’ve done is worse off, because now I walk around feeling down on myself and ashamed of myself for not sticking with and to the truth as I originally saw it.

forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to walk around feeling down on myself and ashamed of myself for not sticking with and to the truth as I originally saw it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to thus make it seem as if I am not extremely grateful in every sense of the word gratefulness for the well needed assistance, which I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow a pattern of adding my 2 cents of carnal knowledge and information into things, (once again) making it seem as if I didn’t get the message or understood what I was shown, when in fact I did and saw it with clarity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my participation in the mind is uncanny, where I mix the familiar (my preprograming) and unfamiliar (the truth of things) in thinking/perceiving/believing this mixture of the truth and carnal justification to be how things work, not realizing that carnal justification which is in fact preprograming can’t/don’t/will not, mix with the truth in anyway what so ever and makes no sense, so how is it then that I believe the truth can be compromised?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the truth can be compromised.
Within this; I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go through extensive brainwashing, meaning I’ve never known the real truth, (not to be used as an excuse) so when seen, laid out in common sense, it at times is still hard to believe (but understood). Within that; I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my mind to interject based on my preprogramming and try overshadowing what the truth is and within this; I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in turn create more consequences for myself to have to live with and walk through as if I haven’t experienced enough already.

When and as I see that I am resisting the truth with proof that it does in fact work, by turning around and creating my own truth of things by adding my 2 cents of carnal knowledge and information to it as my based preprogramming way of dealing with things, I stop and breathe. I see/realize/understand that I have accepted and allowed myself to go through extensive brainwashing, meaning I’ve never known the truth, (not to be used as an excuse) so when seen, laid out in common sense, it at times is still hard to believe (but understood), within that I accepted and allowed my mind to interject based on my preprogramming and try overshadowing what the truth is, where my participation in the mind is uncanny in mixing the familiar (my preprograming) and unfamiliar (the truth of things) in thinking/perceiving/believing this mixture of the truth and carnal justification to be how things work, not realizing that carnal justification which is in fact preprogramming can’t/don’t/will not mix with the truth in any way what so ever and makes no sense and is an over kill of some sort where I disavowed the truth in which I was assisted.

I commit myself to when assisted with the truth of what things are and how they work and the reason I am experiencing things, to no longer disavowing it, but instead to breathe through my wanting to react and adding my 2 cents of carnal knowledge and information to it by applying self-forgiveness in the moment when the thought arise.

I commit myself to no longer try and compromise the truth with anything, as I will be compromising who I am as life.

I commit myself to stopping my mind from presenting me with these patterns from time to time and following them, by continuing to investigate each one as they come up through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, to get to the point of being able to stand equal to and one with who self is-knowing living who I am through and through.

I commit myself to no longer placing myself in a position of feeling down on myself and ashamed of myself, by sticking with the truth as I originally saw it.

I commit myself to expressing/showing gratefulness in every sense of the word, by living as a practical example of the truth of what I was assisted with works and sharing my realizations.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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