Day 171: Escapism

EscapismMagicians have mastered the art of escapism by using the sleight of hand trick where an illusion is created to make you believe through mental diversion that there’s a way out. Our infatuation with escapism makes the illusion believable and possible from the perspective of thinking/perceiving/believing that we can “Opt out” of what we have created as an unpleasant reality for ourselves. The fact is what we see as an “escape” is the prolongation of the inevitability of the consequences we must and will face for what we have created as this unpleasant reality in which we believe escapism helps to relieve persisting feelings of depression or “general” sadness. So the next question should be; “Where did this depression or “general” sadness come from”? This is a question that’s never looked at but pushed aside and masked through a mental diversion by means of entertainment or recreation where we try to “Tame” life expression but end up “Wrecking” Creation under the belief that this fantastical daydream of our is real.

I have been one with a tendency to seek, or practice seeking, distraction from what normally has to be endured, such as the rigors of my daily life by means of entertainment or recreation, for example I’ve used making music as a form of escapism in a past relationship when I didn’t know how to communicate with my partner, so I would make music or in the past whenever I would become overwhelmed with the way my life was going, I would make music. I have also used sports as a form of escapism to “clear my head” so to speak, such as bike riding, playing basketball or doing capoeira, thinking that I need to release this energy that I’ve built up inside me, not realizing that all alone it was my mentality that I needed to take a look at, but all I did was create a mental diversion which was no solution because once I finished diverting myself with entertainment and recreation the problems would still exist and on top of all that in most cases become worse.

Although escapism by means of entertainment and recreation presents a pretty picture what is not seen/realized/understood as I see it, is that escapism is the diminishing of myself and the limiting of my self-expression through the wrecking of this creation whenever I attempt to “escape”.

Within this I am redefining escapism from that of; “mental diversion by means of entertainment or recreation as an “escape” from the perceived unpleasant or banal aspects of daily life”, to that of; the use of breath in every moment as a diversion from the mind back into my human physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be infatuated with escapism by making the illusion believable and possible from the perspective of thinking/perceiving/believing that I can “Opt out” of what I have created as an unpleasant reality for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an unpleasant reality for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/perceive/believe that I can “Opt out” of what I have created as an unpleasant reality for myself.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize the fact that what I see as an “escape” is the prolongation of the inevitability of the consequences I must and will face for what I have created as this unpleasant reality in which I believe escapism helps to relieve persisting feelings of depression or “general” sadness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe escapism helps to relieve persisting feelings of depression and sadness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become depressed and sad at times when I had no answers as to why/how I have created this unpleasant reality for myself and thus seek to distract myself from what I was seeing as my creation by means of entertainment or recreation.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to consider looking at the question of; “Where did this depression or “general” sadness come from, but instead push it aside.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to push aside and mask this question through a mental diversion by means of entertainment or recreation where I tried to “Tame” life expression but ended up “Wrecking” Creation under the belief that this fantastical daydream of mine was real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have been one with a tendency to seek, or practice seeking, distraction from what normally has to be endured, such as the rigors of my daily life by means of entertainment or recreation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have used making music as a form of escapism in a past relationship when I didn’t know how to communicate with my partner, so I would make music.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in the past whenever I would become overwhelmed with the way my life was going, I would make music, thinking that it would make things better, not realizing that escaping the problems would only make matters worse.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have also used sports as a form of escapism to “clear my head” so to speak, such as bike riding, playing basketball or doing capoeira, thinking that I needed to release this energy that I’ve built up inside me, not realizing that all alone it was my mentality that I needed to take a look at.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to then create a mental diversion which was no solution because once I finished diverting myself with entertainment and recreation the problem would still exist and on top of all that in most cases become worse.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that although escapism by means of entertainment and recreation presents a pretty picture, as I see it, escapism is the diminishing of myself and the limiting of my self-expression through the wrecking of this creation whenever I attempt to “escape”.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to be infatuated with escapism, I stop and breathe. I see/realize/understand that this short-lived passion is an illusion of disposition in which I use as a mental diversion to not have to face what I have created as an unpleasant reality for myself where whenever I believe my communication is ineffective or become overwhelmed with the way my life is going, I seek or practice seeking, distractions from what normally has to be endured such as the rigors of my daily life by means of entertainment or recreation, where I would use music and sports as a means of escapism, not realizing that escaping the problem would make matters worse and perpetuate the depression and sadness I experienced, when all I had to do was to correct my mentality by stopping my mind from running amuck and thus there would be no need to escape.

I commit myself to facing what I have created as an unpleasant reality for myself and correcting it to a reality that is best for all life.

I commit myself to no longer becoming depressed or sad at the way my life is going, but instead to realize that it is by my design, which means if I designed my life the way it is, then I can stop my participation in this design and redesign my life to that which is best for all life.

I commit myself to no longer seek, practice seeking distractions from what normally has to be endured, such as the rigors of my daily life, but to stick to my process and walk through each and every point of resistance and utilize breath in every moment.

I commit myself to no longer use entertainment or recreations such as making music or playing sports as a form of escapism, but instead to use them as natural forms of self-expression.

I commit myself to no longer try and “Tame” life but instead to live and treat life as what is best for all life.

I commit myself to no longer “Wrecking” Creation under the belief that this fantastical daydream of mine is real, but to instead stop my mind in all its facets.

I commit myself to redefining escapism from that of; “mental diversion by means of entertainment or recreation as in “escape” from the perceived unpleasant or banal aspect of daily life” to that of; the use of breath in every moment as a diversion from the mind back into my human physical body.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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