Day 54: Changing Into Character

Changing into CharacterWe change into character after our eyes have taken a mental picture of someone or something that we would like to align ourselves to, (be/become). The most profound way of achieving this is through watching movies where after the movie is finished we walk away with the feeling of confidence and thinking that we can or are that character and should live our lives accordingly. By following that thought around we are creating a pattern of copycat sum. Thinking that we are evolving as a person/being, but in fact we are not. We are devolving by pushing ourselves further and further away from the truth of who we are, in which we have buried deep under layer after layer after layer of consequences that we have created, will and must inevitably face for ourselves, within ourselves, by ourselves. Not realizing that we are in fact following our own pre-programed design.

Throughout my life whenever I have seen someone do something that I would like to do or be a certain way that I would like to (be/become), I would create a character and patronize it around myself by using copycat sum. It all started when I was a child, looking up to my older brother who I wanted to be like, so everything that I saw him do I followed behind him and did it myself to an extent. I.E. He went to the military and when I got old enough I also went to the military. From then on whenever I saw someone that I wanted to be like or something that someone did that I also wanted to do, I created a character and patronize it around myself by using copycat sum. As I walk my process in finding out who I really am, I see/realize/understand that I must face these characters and de-construct the patterns from which I have created them in order to find out who I am as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take a mental picture of someone or something that I would like to align myself to, (be/become).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to achieve this through watching movies where after the movie was finished I would walk away with the feeling of confidence and thinking that I can or is that character and should live my life accordingly.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that by following that thought around I was creating a pattern of copycat sum. Thinking that I was evolving as a person/being, but in fact I wasn’t. I was devolving by pushing myself further and further away from the truth of who I am, in which I have buried deep under layer after layer after layer of consequences that I have created, will and must inevitably face for myself, within myself, by myself. Not realizing that I was in fact following my own pre-programed design.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I was evolving as a person/being whenever I would change into character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to bury who I am deep under layer after layer after layer of consequences that I have created for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow my own pre-program design within changing into character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to throughout my life whenever I have seen someone do something that I would like to do or be a certain way that I would like to (be/become), I would create a character and patronize it around myself by using copycat sum.

As I walk my process in finding out who I really am, I see/realize/understand that I must face these characters and de-construct the patterns from which I have created them in order to find who I am as life.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself changing into character, I stop and breathe. I see/realize/understand that by following the thought around of thinking/perceiving/believing that I should change into character, I am creating a pattern of copycat sum in which I am devolving by pushing myself further and further away from the truth of who I am I which I have buried deep under layer after layer after layer of consequences that I have created, will and must inevitably face for myself, within myself, by myself.

I commit myself to no longer accept and allow myself to change into character when and as I see someone doing something that I would like to do or being a certain way that I would like to (be/become), but instead realizing that’s not who I am. I will de-construct each pattern that leads to creating/changing into character through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application which will assist and support me in remove all of the layers in which I have buried the truth of who I am as life.

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About carltontedford

In Process.
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